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You’re listening to the Elevate podcast with me, Kyle Goldie. This is episode number 22. And on today’s episode, we’re going to be chatting about my very own mental health, my battles with anxiety, and what I do to overcome these internal battles. And with everything going on in the world today, we need to be more present with our mental health and normalize these conversations. Let’s dive into it.
It’s been a long time since I have done a podcast episode, and there’s many reasons for that, but I will share that on the next episode. Today’s topic is too important to put off.
I don’t share about my personal life often, but it’s about time I did.
And I simply want to share because I want you to know that you aren’t alone.
We all have our invisible battles.
Personally, I’ve been battling anxiety for the better part of my entire life. And in particular, hypochondria. And for those of you who experience similar sort of mental battles, it’s crippling at times. And sometimes, it comes out of nowhere. And because I run multiple businesses from home, when I have high-anxiety days, it can stop work in its tracks.
That all said, work can’t stop. Work has to be accomplished. There’s so many things that I need to get done not only for myself, but for the many personal clients I serve with their SEO, websites, coaching calls, blogging, and of course – the endless customer service for my online courses.
All of it piles up to the point where I feel so much pressure on my shoulders to tackle all of it, and there’s also the pressure of being an online educator that people look up to that I have quote-unquote… “all my shit together.”
But you know what – I’m human. I don’t have everything together. I have anxiety. I suffer from hypochondria, even though I know it’s ridiculous to have some lines of thought that I have at times. And it all weighs on me.
On Instagram, Facebook, TikTok – and wherever else – it’s this constant facade that everybody has their shit together. And truly, no one does. Not even the multi-millionaire quote-unquote influencers that we all know about. Sure, they make money. But they still have anxieties of their own, still deal with depression, still have invisible illnesses, still go through divorce and death.
And you know what – THAT is normal.
And as we all get older, we see more of that side of life because again, it’s normal.
And personally, the more I feel that we normalize these anxieties and these things that we struggle with, the more that we can all know that we are not alone.
Many communities preach about community over competition, but we need to get even more basic than that. We need to get back to humanity supporting humanity.
And as I’ve spoken about on a previous podcast episode, community over competition doesn’t really exist. Not on a grand scale, anyways. And I say that because even the people who preach it – many of them still don’t even truly benefit the community around them. Some do, but many don’t. Not when it really comes down to stepping up to the plate and truly serving.
As an example, I gave away more than $50,000 worth of free 1:1 coaching during the early stages of COVID19. And the feedback I got on that was “I’m still not doing enough.” But at a certain point, I can only serve so much for free. Because when one-on-one, it’s nearly impossible to provide to an entire community of people.
I also chose to cut my signature course by 50% during COVID 19 to help people financially, but to many, that still wasn’t enough.
I’ll leave that to a future episode of the podcast, but I am only sharing because that’s part of my anxiety. Part of the weight on my shoulders.
Most think that’s a great thing as an educator. And personally, I am one of those people. But when you have online courses that serve a very large audience around the world, it can feel like you a personally coaching hundreds of people simultaneously, 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. And when even a single business seems to be struggling with one thing or another, I internalize it, I empathize with it, and I do my best to give that particular business owner the answer to help them get quick clarity on knowing what to do with that particular issue.
At scale, that’s impossible.
For my own mental health at scale, that’s impossible.
But that’s what I’ve been doing and I’ve been running myself into the ground. I’ve been serving my students and private clients more than I’ve been serving my own business, my own health, and my own life.
Because when my own body becomes exhausted, anxiety gets worse. And when anxiety gets worse, I get less productive. And when I get less productive, anxiety gets worse again. It’s a nasty cycle. And it’s one that’s really difficult to break.
First, I continue to work. Because that’s what needs to get done.
And sometimes, that’s enough. Because it gets my mind onto something that’s important. It gets my mind wrapped around how to get you the best results possible. And because most true answers aren’t black & white, the challenge of getting to a clear answer FAST most often helps my mind get distracted – but distracted by focusing on something that can actually provide results.
But it’s not always that way.
Sometimes the anxiety is too much for me to even focus on work. And for my own mental health, I have to put work to the side. I have to put EVERYTHING to the side to just focus on my internal self.
That’s when I do one of a few different things, depending on what’s going on within that good ‘ol brain of mine.
A few things that work for me are to watch funny or scary movies (not dramas), playing a game on my phone or Playstation to “escape,” hop in our hot tub, or listen to the Calm app on my phone and do some guided meditations. Another thing that I have noticed that helps is to simply journal. Get it down on paper, blog about it, do what I am doing right now and do a podcast about it.
One way or another though, get it out.
Don’t internalize it and just think that it will dissipate on its own. In my experience, it just gets stored underneath the surface and comes out later.
Don’t go it alone. Anxiety can be crippling. Get some support. Talk about it. Find a safe space. Your mental health is so important to everything that you do.
When you improve your own mental health, it can help improve your relationships, your business, your profits, your life – everything.
If you haven’t connected with me yet, hop in my free Facebook community, send me a message on Instagram, or simply write me a message on my website. I’m always here for you. I actually give a shit about you.
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